Can we just be us? Part 29

Part 29

Now that she had more free time she decide to clean around the apartment herself and get rid of things she didn't need. Starting with her closet, Hessa opened up the drawers and took out all the cloths she wasn't wearing anymore and folded them nicely into a box. She prepared two sections of boxes one to give away and the other to throw out.  Going through her lingerie drawer she spotted the one she had the day he told her he loves her. She grabbed it and placed it in the box with the other pile of ruined clothing.
  
After finishing with her closet she went to the kitchen and opened up all the cabinets. Cleaning out her closet was not helping with clearing up her mind so she decided to drown herself in more work. Getting into the upper cabinets she found new unused plates still in bubble wraps. Stretching her body to get to them her mind directly jumped into the incident she had with Saif. All her mind did was remember the moments they shared. Hessa let go of the plates and ran to the box and grabbed the lingerie. She sat on the bed with her phone on her hands wanting to dial his number but couldn't find the strength to do so.

...

It was one of those days when everything was on order at work and everyone was going home early. Hamad made his exit out of his office and passed towards Saif to check on how his friend was doing. 

Hamad: hey

Saif: 6ale3?

Hamad: haih, 5ala9t eli 3alay

Hamad noticed that his friend was not his usual self, and them being guys they don't talk about their feelings they hide them and find a way to blow it off. He took a seat beside saif's office table 

Saif: how is the married life going?

Hamad: good,  good (shaking his head, agreeing with what he was saying) what about you? hessa?

Saif: (he rubbed his chin and creased his eyebrows not knowing what to say) ma3arf wallah

Hamad: lets meet the guys tonight

Knowing the right thing to say, Saif was there when he went through the same thing with Jawaher and he needed to be there for Saif. 

Getting into his car he drove home, the feeling was different. Getting back home to someone, to a family. He never saw himself doing so. It has been a long time since he last wanted to know everything single detail about someone and make an effort. He parked his car in his usual spot and looked over to find Meera's car parked which meant that she was at home. He walked over to the door step and unlocked the door then entered. 

Sara: why are you being so judgmental

Meera: I am not, just listen to me

Sara: no you are being just like mom, you can't even trust me to make my own decisions

She stormed out of the house with her car eyes in his hands

Meera: you can't just storm out on me (yelling after her)

Sara: watch me

She walked straight to her car and drove away without looking back

Meera: great, just great

She held her forehead and took a seat on the couch

Hamad: and who said teenagers are easy

He managed to make her laugh

Meera: it was your idea you know

Hamad: it's a phase, she will be back

Meera: what you are a teenager expert now, do you have a hidden teenager somewhere I should know about

Hamad: maybe

She raised an eyebrow

Hamad: it was long before I met you (he joked)

Throwing his body next to hers and taking a seat on the couch

Hamad: so what are your plans for the day?

Meera: I'm meeting up with the girls, you?

Hamad: the guys, speaking of the girls, how is your friend Hessa?

Meera: she's good, why do you ask?

Hamad: Saif is not talking about it, did something happen with the both of them

Meera: he told her he loves her

Hamad chuckled as he heard her say that. His friend never ends to amuse him. It was a shock but Hamad saw it coming , he saw the way his Saif talked about her and how he was when he was with her.

Meera: aren't you shocked?

Hamad: I am but I believe him

Meera: really? I don't want to seem rude but he doesn't look like the 
commitment type

Hamad: he is not (straight forward) Hessa, she got to him

Later that night

Slowly getting back to her routine she decided to go out with friends and put it all behind her. She was meeting with Meera and Aisha to have dinner, a girls night out. 

Aisha: I can't believe you told her and not me

Meera: She just likes me more than you

Hessa: it's not that,  she was there that's all

Aisha: so?

Both Meera and Aisha looked at her waiting for the hot sex and hook ups since she was vague the last time.

Hessa: nothing I ended it

Meera: why? The last time you said it was good

Aisha: I feel so left out right now

Meera: would you stop it,  she hasn't told me much anyways so both of us are in the dark

The two started to bicker while Hessa remained quite not saying a word. After having their quarrel in a restaurant that seemed elegant they turned around to Hessa with an expression in her face that they haven't seen before

Can we just be us? Part 28

Part 28

The next morning

The moment she woke up she heard him say it sincerely.  It was the first thing that popped in her head early in the morning. She barely slept remembering what happened last night. She got up to wash up and get started with her day. She was determined to put it behind her pretend it never happened.

Meanwhile...

Hamad woke up and turned to the clock, it read 9:34 AM. It was the weekend and he did not set an alarm knowing the day Meera had yesterday was stressful and she needed all the sleep she could get. She laid asleep on her side next to him with her face few inches away from him and her legs intertwined with his. He could feel her bra-less breasts on his biceps and her hand on his chest. It was torture, seeing her so close and almost feeling her but couldn't do anything about it, especially after what happened yesterday. After her mother left they did not speak of it again and pretended like it never happened. 

Meera started to slightly move and moan as she woke up. She opened her eyes and saw the side of Hamad's face, it was best part of the morning. Looking at his beautiful sharp jaw line he turned his head and looked right at her.

Meera: oh, sorry I didn't realize that I moved in my sleep

She did that a lot but did not realize it, Hamad on the other hand remained on the bed and she did the same. 

Hamad: how about we ask Sara to stay with us

Meera: permanently?

Hamad: why not? her punishment is almost over, and she seems to like it here

Meera: we will tell her when she gets back

Meera was surprised at what he said. Hamad was the quite keep to himself type of person. 

...

After thinking  about it endlessly he decided to meet up with her and talk about what happened.  He felt rejected for the very first time, and he wanted an answer. His feelings for her scared her away and he wanted to know why. 

Getting into all this started as a game, something that would get his mind off things and have fun but turned into something much more. 

He texted

Meet me at the usual coffee shop

They were meeting each other for the first time after what happened.  It was awkward for both sides. Hessa wanting to escape it all and Saif wanting answers.  He waited for her in their usual seats and looked around trying to keep his heart from beating too fast. 

When it came to her, he would experience things he hadn't before it was all new to him. Looking around he heard the bell at the door as she walked in. He wished that she didn't look good as if nothing happened when he spent all the days and nights thinking about her

Hessa: hi

Saif: hi, you look good

Hessa: don't

She stood there looking at him then continued to speak

Hessa: we started this whole thing based on hooking up, this is fun don't make it into something it is not

Saif just looked at her speak and didn't say anything in return

Hessa: we are friends with occasional benefits

Saif: I meant what I said

He looked directly in her eyes

Saif: I love you, I'm not taking it back

Hessa: I can't do this

She was about to leave when he got up and held her hand to stop her from moving

Saif: it's not that you can't, you won't,  I know that you love me but your too scared to admit it. Just remember that I told you exactly how I feel and you walked away

He let her go and started walking giving her his back. He felt love for the first time, and got his heart broken and it was all because of one girl. That moment he wished he never met her and never got involved. He was fine all alone not caring, or is that what he thought. 

...

Sara was at home on the couch with her laptop on her lap surfing the web when Meera walked to her to have a sisterly chat.

Meera: did you have fun with your friends?

Sara: yeah

Meera: are you liking your stay here?

Sara: yeah

Being a teenager she just answered with one word and was preoccupied with her laptop.

Meera: would you like to stay here? permanently?

Sara: ok

Meera actually expected this, knowing her sister was relieved about staying as far away from their mother. She knew that Sara hated talking about her mother and the way she treats them sometimes. Heading towards the kitchen she saw Hamad standing beside the fridge.

Hamad: what did she say?

Meera: ok, literally just ok

Hamad laughed

Hamad: teenagers, what are we going to do

Meera sighed, it was official her sister is going to stay with them, and all the teenage drama that came with it. It was worrying but it was the right thing to do.

...

Staying at home was the best thing to do is what she thought. She confronted him and ended things, now she can go back to her normal life without distractions. It was night so Hessa decided to go to bed stripping to her panties and bra she applied body lotion and placed her hands behind her back to unhook her bra. But her mind only thought of Saif and how he was the only to take it off when they had one of their "special nights". She shook her head to get him out of her mind and went to sleep.

Can we just be us? Part 27

Part 27

Hessa: did you mean what you said? 

He just looked at her confused or just trying to say something but just couldn't get anything out

Hessa: did you mean it when you said you love me? 

She said with a clear disapproval on her face and he could see that. He could tell clearly that see wanted him to say no.

Saif: it was just in the heat of the moment

...

Sarah and their mother were catching up on what everything, mostly Sara telling her mother what she was doing for the rest of the summer. 

Sara: the beach house is amazing mom, it's so much fun, the view at night is just wonderful

Mom: tell your sister to spend on us, then we can have what other people have

Meera just rolled her eyes, these comments used to hurt her before but not anymore. Her mother has said worse and now there was nothing her mother can say that would hurt her anymore. 

Sara: speaking of the beach house

She turned to face Meera

Sara: the girls are planning to go to the beach house and sleepover, can I?

Meera: yes, don't go out after 10

Sara: yes I know

Hamad: your allowance?

Sara: I still did not spend it all, and I have my emergency credit card (sounding rehearsed)

Mom: you have a curfew? (sounding almost shocked and impressed) it is a good thing she is living with you, it saves me the trouble and the headache

Just then Meera saw the look on her younger sister's face. It broke her heart how harsh her mother can be to her own children.

Sara: yes because rising me is trouble and a headache to you, what's new mother

And with that she left 

Meera: wow, that is a new low for you

She left to her bedroom to collect her thoughts and calm herself down
Hamad following her after sitting his mother in law down at the dining table to have lunch.

Meera: I cannot believe she just said that, in front of Sara this time

Hamad: hey, she is with her friends now having fun, and we will talk to her when she gets back

She took a deep breath

Hamad: you are doing fine

She looked directly at into his eyes and moved closer and closer till she grabbed the collar of his shirt and placed her lips on his. She did not know what got over her but she needed to do that. She just closed her eyes and went with, and it felt good, really good. Everything in her mind just disappeared, her mother's hurtful words, her sister's hurt look, everything.

Hamad on the other hand was taken by surprise. He has been thinking of doing the same thing but did not have the courage to do so.  He responded by closing his eyes taking in the taste of his wife. 

Meera pulled back slowly fluttering her eyelashes together till she met his gaze again. But her mother's voice in the background ruined the moment.

Mom: are you going to make me have lunch alone

Meera did not know whether to thank or get mad at her mother's interference. That was not suppose to happen, it was not part of their deal. She turned around and walked away leaving him with nothing but the taste of her lips and the memory of their first kiss.

...

Hessa: oh thank god (sighing in relief)

She came in after that awkward confrontation and made herself at home. She 
had been here many times that she lost count. 

Hessa: I can't believe that I actually freaked over this

Saif 's point of view:

I saw the look on her face and how worried she was waiting for my answer. How could I say it? I can't believe I'm willing to admit it to her when I barely admit it to myself.

Hessa's worries disappeared and she started to talk about her day and what they missed the past couple of days.  She talked and he mainly listened and watched her talk.

Hessa: I'm telling you that poor intern won't last a month, I remember when I was in her place,  thank god those days are over

She looked over to him and saw him looking right back at her but it was different this time

Hessa: why are you looking at me like that? 

Saif: I missed watching you talking about your day

For the very first time in his life he was sincere but she took it as a line to have their 'usual nights'. She smiled and got closer

Hessa: this is what I missed

She started to kiss his neck down from his shoulder upwards towards his ear. She knew exactly how to get him in the mood. He closed his eyes and felt something he never did before,  it felt like his heart was going to explode and he couldn't keep it together much longer. He pulled back and held her by her shoulders and said

Saif: I lied

She kept quite looking at him trying to understand what he was trying to tell her

Saif: I lied when I told you that I didn't mean it... because I do... I love you

Her eyes were in shock as she looked at him not wanting to believe in what he was saying.  

She suddenly got up and picked up her things

Saif: what are you doing

Hessa: I'm sorry, I have to leave

She ran out the door as fast as she could

Saif just stood there watching the back of her walk out right in front of him. It was the first time he was true to himself and decided to act on what he was feeling but regretted more than anything else. He wished that he kept his mouth shut and just bottled up all his feelings like he usually does. The moment he decided to tell her she left, leaving him alone.

She went back to her apartment as fast she could without looking back and just sat there on the couch trying to make sense of what happened. Getting into this all she wanted is for not anything to happen, not wanting feelings or anything that could complicate things. She hated all this and wished it never happened. 

His words just rang in her head, it was all what she thought about before going to bed.

Can we just be us? Part 26

Part 26

Meera: ok so I have to vacuum the living room, Sarah go wash the dishes at the sink please, then through all the laundry in the wash

Sarah: would you calm down, she is not even going near the laundry

Meera: well she is going to find something to nag or criticize about

Hamad walked in and saw the ladies in chaos, in hurry to clean everything

Hamad: what is going on?

He said confused

Meera: our mother, that is what is going on

Sarah: would you talk to your wife

She left the living room to get away with not having to do anything around the house. 

Hamad: stop stressing yourself out, we had this talk already

He sat down holding her hand so she could do the same. She took a seat but their hands still holding each other.

Hamad: it's your house

She held his hand tighter and got closer to him planting a kiss on his cheek.
She let go of his hand and stood up disappearing right in front of his eyes.

Hamad's point of view:

It's been a long time since I held her hand. I missed how they felt in my hands, so soft and smooth.  And her lips I just wish I could feel them all the time, anytime. This woman drives me crazy.

...

Days have passed and Saif noticed that when he texted her she would reply with one word or not reply at all. He figured it was because of what he said and he hasn't stopped thinking about it since. He just wished that he kept his mouth shut and said nothing. He regretted that night and hated himself for it.

As for Hessa all she did was think of was he said. He would text and she would claim that she was busy or ignore his messages. It was working for her or it is what she thought until she finally snapped and decided to reply

message to Saif
I'm coming over tonight

She sat there with her mind away from work thinking of what to say when she gets there. He hasn't spoken about it and neither did she.
  
...

The door bell rang. Meera knew it was going to be a long day

Hamad: you will be fine

He whispered in her ear, getting closer that his cheek touched her head and he could smell her shampoo. She on the other hand felt his breath on her neck. This whole situation with her mother is frustrating but he managed to calm her down and turn her on at the same time.

Meera's mom: so this is where you have been hiding my daughter from me (referring to sarah's situation)

Meera: hello mother, it's nice to see you too

She said in a sarcastic way

Sarah: hi mama

Sarah hugged her mother and kissed her. After all the fighting she was still her youngest and her favorite daughter. 

Hamad: how are you? 

He hugged her and kissed her too

Mom: I'm good, Meera are you going to leave me standing the whole visit

Taking a deep breath

Meera: here is the living room

They all walked over and took a seat

Meera: so how is Ahmed and Abdalla?(her younger brothers)

Mom: if you ever visited the house you would know that they are fine

Hamad: are you hungry? Because Meera made lunch and her cooking is delicious 

He said trying to quite down the situation

It worked for a while but not as much as they all hoped for. Their mother started getting into the whole money, allowance and budget. All the topics that she loved nagging about which made their father run into another woman's arms leaving a dysfunctional family behind.

Meera: he is a 26 year old grown man, until when are going to baby him?

Mom: just because you are too selfish to spend on your brother that does not mean I am babying him

Meera: He is more than capable looking for a job but he relies on you to spend for him, and where does that money come from, ME!!

Mom: so this is about money? fine we don't need your money

Meera: really? you don't need my money? tell me how are you going to survive without it? Ahmed doesn't work, alya doesn't want to spend on you, tell me!!

Her mother just turned her head around knowing her daughter was right but was too stubborn to say so.

Just Hamad witnessed one of their many arguments. He now realizes what her family was really like and it made her into the woman she is now. People would feel sorry for her or just dismiss it as family fights but he did not. He was impressed at how she dealt with it and how she became stronger because of her relationship with her family. 

Hamad: I could look into it, like find something, a job for him maybe

Mom: oh Hamad I'm so sorry you had to witness all this, it's just one of these family arguments, you know how exaggerated they can

She said trying to sound polite

Meera could see the lies that were coming out of her mother's mouth.

Mom: it's not that he is incapable of finding a job, he is just lazy, but could you really help?

Meera: now you want Hamad to do it for him, leave my husband out of this

Hamad: baby its fine (he held her hand), what I know that he is a mechanical engineering major am I right?

Meera's point of view:

Did he just call me baby? why do I even like it so much?

Mom: yes (saying it almost in a sigh)

Hamad: the company has nothing to offer him, but I could look around in other acquaintances of mine

Mom: that would be more than enough

Hamad: but you have to understand that the job will be on him, he is going to have to follow what they say, I will have no say in it

Meera: there will be no helping him after this

...

Hessa parked her car in the usual place and got out of it to start walking to his doorsteps. When she arrived, he opened the door with a smile on his face.  He realized how much he missed her, not seeing for days and leaving things the way they did.

Hessa: did you really mean what you said?